Bitchin' House if you don't like people (secluded and private). A great buy for the adrenaline junkie that owns the biggest ladder out there to avoid scaffolding just to clean the gutters, roof, inner stairwell fans, windows and other ridiculously vaulted ceilings and windows. Many perks, including a detached 1800 square foot shop, another 1000 square foot garage, outdoor concrete 'torture chamber' or cold storage area depending on your needs. We also have wildlife that will make your small creatures a snack, Homeowners insurance premiums that will make you cry harder than when you close escrow and get those keys in hand and plenty of parking... The driveway and directional signs suck so bad that I guarantee you will never be bothered by solicitors... Your friends and family invited to see the poison oak glamour and visit the 'Manor' will most likely get lost, as well as the crappy FedEx guy (UPS never fails though!). The septic system is as large as the fleet of horses the current owner rode in on so you can have ALL the people over for Thanksgiving and not have to call a plumber the next day. This house is literally THE EXPLETIVE on holidays if you have people that love you enough to show up and drive the 'scary' road on up. Plenty of room for Tiger cages or chicken coops, The bathtub is large enough for 2 large humans or some dogs that just got sprayed by a skunk. Hit your realtor up for a smokin' deal and take this gem to the next level - even though the next owner can't compete with how awesome the incumbent owners are :). You also may not know about our amazing rivers and lakes all around. It's secret and if you share with 'city folk' you're guaranteed to get leaches next time you hit the American or Bear for sure. You must also speak fluent sarcasm to speak with the few 'neighbors' up here. And play the banjo. Cheers y'all.
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